I guess sometimes there are things that you can’t let go. Even if you want to let go of them, they refuse to leave. Almost as if they are clinging onto you like a piece of string. I have a hard time of letting things go.

Mostly because I have been through those times where you can’t let go. You need all of that energy to do so.. and it may take time to let that happen.

Even though I am an adult, there are things that are difficult to let go. I somehow still feel like a kid/teen trapped in an adult’s mind and body. Because its troubling for me to let my kid and teen self go.

I’m learning about new things but the trouble is that I am worried about failing or losing my confidence and breaking down crying because I am scared of doing things on my own. I know I have done other things on my own but there are other things that I can’t handle.

All I want to do is to do this course without having to stress or worry about it. But even if I want to, there is always something to worry about in the end. And I hate that so much. I just want to go through with it and do my best.

I must do this. For my parents, and myself. I will do it and get it done. No more worrying. No more stressing out.. I just want to do this course. My first.. actual online course.